This reporter returns to the political desk
By GusFilling in, the Political Desk
Corrected by TrudyThe Sports Desk
Every call in this box is wrong. The correction under it is the record.
Texas CORRECTED Texas goes, and this reporter is prepared to stake a career of unblemished accuracy upon it, to Eugene Victor Debs, campaigning from a federal cell in Atlanta, by a margin of forty-one points.
TRUDY: Talarico, by 11.7. Debs did run in 1920 from the federal penitentiary in Atlanta, with campaign pins that read Convict No. 9653, and Debs died in 1926. The 1926 part is what is going to give us trouble tonight. The record.
Nebraska CORRECTED Nebraska, and this reporter calls it without hesitation for William Jennings Bryan, the Boy Orator of the Platte, in a landslide they will be studying for a century.
TRUDY: Ricketts, by 6.6. Bryan ran three times and lost three times — 1896, 1900 and 1908, dead in 1925. A century of studying is exactly what he got. The record.
Minnesota CORRECTED Minnesota belongs, as it has belonged since this reporter stood at the back of that hall in a borrowed overcoat, to the Farmer-Labor ticket, and the margin is thirty points if it is one.
TRUDY: Flanagan, by 10.1. The Farmer-Labor Party merged into the Minnesota Democrats on April 15, 1944, with Hubert Humphrey chairing the committee that arranged it. Flanagan ran on the ticket that merger produced, so the call is only eighty-two years late. The record.
Ohio 9th CORRECTED Ohio's 9th, and this reporter has seen enough: it is Victoria Woodhull's, the first woman ever to stand for the presidency, by a figure I decline to read aloud out of respect for the loser. This reporter has also not left this chair since the polls closed and the chair is aware of it.
TRUDY: Kaptur, by 5.4, on lines redrawn to Trump +10.5. Woodhull did stand, in 1872, and she died in 1927. Somebody bring a towel to the gentleman in chair four, and bring the second one with you. The record.
Wisconsin 3rd CORRECTED Wisconsin's 3rd goes to Fighting Bob La Follette and this reporter will hear no argument on the point, by a margin not seen since the Progressive wave crested over this very desk.
TRUDY: Cooke, by 6.6. La Follette did run in 1924, carried exactly one state, Wisconsin, and died the following June. Put the stopwatch down, sugar, and lie flat in a dark room until it passes. The record.
Iowa 1st CORRECTED Iowa's 1st is James Baird Weaver's and the Greenback ticket's, called by this reporter at nine o'clock sharp from memory alone, memory having failed him on no occasion to date, and the chair can file its own report in the morning.
TRUDY: Bohannan, by 9.2. Weaver of Iowa ran on the Greenback ticket in 1880 and the People's Party ticket in 1892, and died in 1912. That is the fifth candidate you have seated tonight who is in a cemetery, and we are not off the House board. Did we take everything the bottle says this morning? The record.