Albany educrats are shielding AP test results from US News & World Report number-crunchers — and their resulting New York high-school rankings are plain ridiculous.
Page B1From§Eachthe early evening edition — 1 September 2026
Albany’s allergy to merit hits top schools in their rankings as California college loses party crown to scandals
Albany top high schools fall in the rankings, attributed to an 'allergy to merit' (0). California's top party college loses its crown after a series of scandals, as the new rankings are released (24). Born in the era of standardized lists, survived by the metric-makers and parents who check them, preceded in death by the notion that merit and fun are stable and measurable. When the scores drop, the blame lands on 'merit'—a word that shifts in the wind. The party crown moves, but the administration stays put. The tradition of ranking schools—by test scores, parties, or scandals—has been survived by the consultants, the headline writers, and the agencies. In lieu of flowers, send your child a list of things that matter more than the ranking.
“When the rankings drop, it's never the system's fault—it's merit, it's scandal, it's a new list. The top schools get dinged, the party crown shifts, but the folks running the show keep their seats.”
“High school rankings and college party reputations are important measures, but sometimes scandals or policy changes alter the results. That doesn't mean the system isn't working—it just means the metrics changed. Or maybe it's just the headlines, I don't know, did I say that?”
The receipts
UCSB is nowhere near top 25 party schools in 2027 rankings –– a sharp drop following high-profile sexual assaults, violent incidents and escalating concerns over student safety on campus.
This page is a back-issue: the story as it ran, receipts as they were. The current edition is at the front.