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Page A12From§Eachthe noon edition — 15 September 2026

Kash Patel preps jabs for Durbin, gets asked instead to explain the FBI's bestiality hiring policy.

“This guy shows up to a hearing about who the FBI is allowed to hire with a whole binder of burns for Durbin, like it's a roast instead of oversight. The actual news out of that room was a United States senator standing up and asking point-blank why the bureau needed a position on bestiality after it dropped its hiring bar — that's not a gotcha, that's the floor your tax dollars set. "Lowering standards" isn't an abstraction, it's the room running out of polite words for it until somebody finally has to just say it on camera.”
Sal
“chip”
Chip

The receipts

Kash Patel’s notes for Senate grilling revealed as he spars with top Dem over FBI leadership: ‘DURBIN INFO’ FBI director brought scripted attack lines, not answers, to Senate oversight
New York Postright§

Patel came ready with several bullet points' worth of jabs to make at Senate Judiciary Committee ranking member Sen. Dick Durbin (D-Ill.) during an oversight hearing Tuesday on Capitol Hill.

Watch: Kennedy grills Patel in tense exchange on bestiality and FBI hiring rules FBI's own memo confirms it lowered hiring standards
CBS Newsmainstream§

During a Senate committee hearing, Sen. John Kennedy, a Louisiana Republican, asked FBI Director Kash Patel about his agency lowering its hiring standards, an internal memo that was first reported on CBS News.

· Kash Patel to testify before Congress next week from the morgue, 9 Sep 2026

· EXCLUSIVE: FBI extraditions soar as Patel ramps up foreign outreach, vows 'no sanctuary' from the morgue, 3 Sep 2026

· Iran’s shadow war is already on US soil — and the FBI can’t wait for another 9/11 from the morgue, 1 Sep 2026

· The United States Senate Republican Party leadership requests that Senator Larry Craig of Idaho stand aside from his Senate committees until the United States Senate Select Committee on Ethics makes a from the morgue, 29 Aug 2007

This page is a back-issue: the story as it ran, receipts as they were. The current edition is at the front. The byline is a pen name for a column drafted by a machine and checked by the editor: how this is made.