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Page A2From§Eachthe late evening edition — 15 September 2026

THE DOUBLE STANDARD

DOJ indicts Russian intelligence for global assassination network, calls oligarch's wedding gift to Trump Jr. unlikely to investigate.

“You already know how this goes: the DOJ can spend months wiretapping foreign hit men but can't spend one afternoon reading a wedding invite. "Unlikely" isn't a legal standard, it's a doorman deciding who gets searched and who gets waved through with the gift bag. When the same office that indicts hired killers won't open an envelope with the boss's kid's name on it, the case wasn't weak, it just wasn't going to happen.”
Sal
“Look, the Attorney General said "unlikely," not "no" — that's just keeping an open mind, that's basic prosecutorial discretion. The family says there's no connection to the oligarch, and Todd Blanche is a serious lawyer who wouldn't just — okay, he also just indicted a completely different set of Russians for running an assassination ring, so clearly the department takes Russian money seriously when — no, that's not — that's a different case, forget I said that.”
Chip

The receipts

· Polish prime minister Donald Tusk says authorities, working with U.S. services, foiled an alleged Russian plot to kill a Ukrainian-American citizen in Warsaw and arrest a suspect accused of acting for from the morgue, 13 Aug 2026

· One-hundred and six members of a Ukrainian "neo-Nazi" youth group are arrested in Russia, suspected of planning attacks, including mass murders. Russia has accused Ukrainian intelligence of financiall from the morgue, 13 Dec 2021

· Russian lawmakers accuse French authorities of arresting Russian-born Telegram CEO Pavel Durov in order to acquire confidential information from Telegram users, and urge Russian users to delete all co from the morgue, 26 Aug 2024

· Ukraine accuses Elon Musk of allowing Russian forces to attack Ukrainian cities after it was revealed that Starlink satellite communications interfered with a drone operation by disabling a communicat from the morgue, 8 Sep 2023

· Abderrahman Bouanane goes on trial in a courtroom set up within a prison in Turku, Finland, accused of two murders and eight attempted murders in an alleged terror attack. The charges, the first terro from the morgue, 9 Apr 2018

· Zelensky blasts rival Ukrainian spy agencies for gunfight with each other during mission to foil Russian terrorist plot from the morgue, 3 Sep 2026

· Missouri House candidate charged in alleged plot to plant cocaine on opponent from the morgue, 3 Sep 2026

· Prosecutor Joseph diGenova resigns from DOJ role investigating Trump-Russia probes from the morgue, 10 Sep 2026

· Trump gave $45,000 cash gifts to Natalie Harp and other aides for holidays from the morgue, 9 Sep 2026

· Trump gave Natalie Harp, other aides $45K gifts: Disclosures from the morgue, 9 Sep 2026

· Trump says Qatar-gifted Air Force One ‘safe to fly’ after emergency slide deploys from the morgue, 9 Sep 2026

· The attorney general of New York announces she is suing the Donald J. Trump Foundation and its directors, President Donald Trump, Donald Trump, Jr., Ivanka Trump and Eric Trump. (CNBC) from the morgue, 14 Jun 2018

· Biden Judge Blocks Trump’s Renewed Efforts To Curb Birthplace Citizenship from the morgue, 3 Sep 2026

· Judge blocks Trump executive order banning ‘birth tourism’ from the morgue, 3 Sep 2026

· Trump Threatens to Rename Strait of Hormuz for Himself as War Pushes Diesel Prices Toward Record High from the morgue, 2 Sep 2026

This page is a back-issue: the story as it ran, receipts as they were. The current edition is at the front. The byline is a pen name for a column drafted by a machine and checked by the editor: how this is made.